Blog: Category: Thrive

For adults and children, interacting with some form of social media has become a daily part of life. Therefore, parents need to stay well informed in order to ensure online safety for their children as they use social media and technology. Understanding how technology works, implementing safety features, and staying informed about and even getting ahead of dangerous online trends and challenges are strategies parents can use to help them monitor their children’s technology usage and keep their children safe. In addition, parents and caregivers can set up in-app settings, utilize external parental control apps, apply social-listening skills, and engage in open communication with their children.

Set up In-App Settings

Each social-media platform includes specific features for parents and caregivers to use as they navigate settings and set up parental controls. The Glossary of Digital Media Platforms, developed by the American Association of Pediatrics (2024), is a resource parents and caregivers can use to better understand the various social-media platforms children and teenagers may want to visit and utilize. Within each resource linked below, parents and caregivers can find information about privacy settings, methods to control messaging and friend selections, and how to set up screen-time management.

• Discord
• Instagram
• Pinterest
• Snapchat
• TikTok
• Facebook
• X (formerly Twitter)
• Apple Operating System (iPhone and Mac)

Utilize External Parental Control Apps

Parents and caregivers can use parental control apps to help them ensure their children interact with social-media applications in a safe way (CNN, 2024). Many of these parental control apps are paid services that adults can put on the devices their child uses. Parents can, then, track information, such as screen-time usage; use website and app filters to block access to specific websites and applications on a device; enact safe search features on sites like YouTube; track calls and SMS (texting); and stop certain language and inappropriate or unwanted conversation topics from being searched and received. Check out some of the following parental control app websites to see if any of these external parental control trackers might work for you and your family.

• Kaspersky Safe Kids
• Qustodio
• Mobicip
• Net Nanny
• OurPact
• Bark

Apply Social Listening

Understanding what online trends and challenges are occurring across social-media platforms (e.g., ALS ice bucket challenge, the cinnamon challenge, the Kia challenge) can help parents prepare to have conversations with their children and help prevent children from engaging in harmful behaviors. Parents can identify current social-media trends and find out more about specific trends by searching hashtags and information trending on social-media sites (e.g., Twitter, TikTok).

Have Open Communication

Openly communicate with your child so you and your child understand why and how to stay safe in online spaces. Although understanding and setting up safety measures and parental controls can help prevent inappropriate media from getting through to your child’s account, making sure your child understands why you are setting boundaries and expectations is also vital. You may want to visit and use the resources, listed below, to help you learn new skills and strategies for communicating with your child.

• Communicating with Adolescents and Teens (mini booster module)
• Setting Boundaries and Expectations (mini booster module)

With Veterans Day approaching on November 11, families have a unique opportunity to teach children about the importance of honoring those who served in the U.S. military. Educating children about Veterans Day can encourage a sense of gratitude, empathy, and respect and broaden children’s understanding of sacrifice and patriotism through meaningful family activities.

Learn together – Read age-appropriate stories, and watch videos about veterans’ experiences. These educational activities can help children grasp the importance of military service. Programs like Honor Their Courage from the Wounded Warrior Project offer engaging resources for children in kindergarten – 12th grade (Care.com, 2023; Wounded Warrior Project).

Talk to Veterans and Listen to Their Stories – Listen to veterans share their stories. Conversations with veterans can be a valuable way for children to learn about military life, sacrifices, and resilience. Perhaps you and your family could look at photos from the veteran’s service days. Discussing the people or events captured in the photo can help children ask thoughtful questions and understand the experiences of veterans on a personal level. Remember to be mindful of each veteran’s comfort level as some may appreciate companionship but may not want to recount their experiences (Military.com; Care.com, 2023).

Get Creative – Encourage children to express their gratitude for veterans by crafting thank-you cards, constructing small flags, or designing paper medals. Writing letters or poems is another meaningful activity that can help children reflect on veterans’ contributions. Families can display these creative projects around the home for Veterans Day, and make this special day an educational and engaging event for the entire family (Wounded Warrior Project; National Education Association, 2020).

Observe Flag Etiquette – Teach children about the significance of the American flag and how to respectfully handle it. Small actions, like displaying and folding the flag correctly, help children understand how the flag represents the sacrifices made by Service members (Care.com, 2023).

Decorate Veterans’ Graves – Visit a cemetery and place flags or flowers on veterans’ graves. This activity can help reinforce the concept of remembrance and respect and may develop into a meaningful family tradition to repeat on future Veterans Days (Military.com).

Invite a Veteran on an Outdoor Outing – If you know a veteran or a military family, consider inviting them for an outing to a local park or on a hike. Spending time in nature can support mental well-being and can offer a relaxed environment for connection (Military.com).

Engage in Service Projects and Community Activities – Connect with local veterans through service projects inspired by organizations like the Wounded Warrior Project and Military Family Life. Engaging in and supporting fundraisers, pen-pal programs, or volunteer events can foster cross-generational friendships and deeper connections with veterans.

Connect Veterans to the Classroom – The National Education Association provides classroom resources to bring Veterans Day to life. Families can collaborate with teachers to arrange visits from veterans or participate in school assemblies, which may enrich children’s learning and community ties (National Educational Association, 2020).

Be a Role Model – Children learn by observing others and often mimic behaviors they have seen. When parents and family members actively honor veterans—whether by making thank-you cards, organizing community events, or simply showing gratitude—they set an example. This helps children learn respect, appreciation, and a genuine sense of patriotism in everyday life.
Through thoughtful, educational activities, families can help make Veterans Day a meaningful tradition that teaches children to appreciate and honor veterans’ sacrifices throughout the year.

Originaly posted September 29, 2020: Talking about Government and Politics with Children

Children learn from a young age about our government by participating in national holidays, such as Memorial Day and the 4^th of July; reciting the pledge of allegiance in school; and commemorating the American flag during National Flag Day and the 4^th of July.  As children progress in school, they learn about the three branches of our federal government and the political process through presidential elections and history lessons. In the United States, the right to vote begins at 18 years of age. Many high-school seniors will be old enough to vote before they graduate! Now, more than ever, with the availability of instant information and prevalence of, at times, misleading facts, it is important for parents to have age-appropriate discussions with their children about government and politics. Here are some tips on how to talk to children of all ages about our government and politics.

Preschool

Complex government systems and political climate may be topics that are beyond what young children can understand. Preschool-aged children are, however, experienced in justice and fairness, and they can understand basic democracy. Explain that voting is democracy. We vote for our leaders. Let them know that we vote for our president every 4 years. Demonstrate democracy by creating voting opportunities for your children and the whole family by holding votes on activities like what movie to watch, what restaurant to go to for dinner, or what kind of pizza to order.

Elementary

By elementary-age, children begin to understand political parties and their platforms. They can also learn about democracy, patriotism, and American history. At this age, children often become aware of political messaging. Explain we are all part of one country with many different kinds of people who have diverse ideas, values, and beliefs. Talk with your children about negative political advertisements on television and social media and help them understand how to research issues in order to separate fact from fiction.

Discuss ads. When a political ad pops up on the computer screen or is played on television, use this opportunity to talk about what the ad claims and how visuals and music are used to evoke emotions in viewers. Talk about the negative ads, and explain it is a competition to get everyone’s vote.

Try news for kids. Many online news sources provide information that is appropriate for children viewers. Explore the news sources listed below with your child.

• Time for Kids
• Scholastic Kids Press Corps

Read books about American politics for kids. There are several books available that teach children about American politics; some of those books are listed below.

• Bad Kitty for President
• Around America to Win the Vote: Two Suffragists, a Kitten, and 10,000 Miles.
• The Founding Fathers: Those Horse-Ridin’, Fiddle-Playin’, Book-Readin’, Gun-Totin’ Gentlemen Who Started America

Avoid hard to understand controversial topics. Children may not able to understand controversial topics, but they are exposed to them and can feel the emotion behind the rhetoric. Remember, children will pick up on your reactions and the reactions of others. When children are present, be mindful of what they hear on television news stations, and mute the television, if you can, to avoid confusing your child or creating anxiety for him or her. Change the channel to something age appropriate for you both to share.

Middle School

Middle school-age children are able to understand more complex concepts and may be learning in-depth information about our government in school. They may have a better understanding of the separation of local, state, and federal governments. This could be a good time to start some deeper discussions.

Talk about political ads. You can ask your child some questions to start a conversation.

• How is a commercial different than a political advertisement?
• How are they similar?
• Who pays for political ads?
• Do political ads help candidates win elections?

Tackle the tough topics. Children in middle school may not be able to understand the bullying and mudslinging that occurs during political campaigns. They may hear about things you will need to explain further, and these topics may be issues you didn’t expect to have to explain. If this happens, try to focus on the positive aspects of the candidates and the important issues of the election. Ask your child to pick out one or two real issues that are important to him or her to discuss.

Try to explain how elections work. Ask your child if he or she votes for a class president at school?  This opportunity presents is a good way to explain the election system to your child. Explore other things your child may vote for in or out of school, such as which book to study next or where the class will visit on their next field trip and discuss the voting process.

High School

High school-aged children are our future voters! At this point, they should be well educated in our government’s history, have a clear understanding of patriotism, and may be able to have debates on controversial topics. Teens learn how to research scientific and factual information in school for projects. Help your child apply this skill and look for the differences between fact and opinion in political messaging.

Discuss campaign issues. Some parents have difficulty understanding certain political issues; this makes explaining those issues to children difficult. National news during election seasons can become captivating for its excessiveness, and information, whether true or false, has the potential to go viral on social media sites. When discussing campaign issues with children, try to ask open-ended questions like, “Do you think they are a good candidate?” “What is important to you?” Let your child speak freely about how he or she feels about a certain topic and let him or her try to make up his or her own mind about topics and issues.

Watch the news together. Pick a topic, and compare the differences in how it is reported on one network versus another. Point out when you hear facts and when you hear opinions.

Talk about polls. Explain that polls are not facts but estimates, and the results of the poll can be completely different depending on where the poll was taken and who is paying for the poll.

Social Media, aka the land of opinion. Talk to children about the risks of conversing about politics with friends, family members, and even strangers (who may follow the same page or politician) on social media. However, be sure to explain that it’s okay to be passionate about one’s values and beliefs, but it is not okay to be disrespectful of others’ values and beliefs. We are all free to have our own political choices.

When considering a healthy diet for children, we often think about the food they eat, but we also need to think about the beverages they drink. While we may focus on food when planning a healthy diet, understanding that sugar-sweetened beverages (SSBs), such as sodas and fruit juices, can significantly impact a child’s health and may contribute to future health problems like obesity, diabetes, and dental issues (Calcaterra et al., 2023) is also essential. Let’s explore why reducing children’s consumption of sugary beverages is important and discover practical strategies parents can use to encourage healthier choices.

Why It Matters

• Research shows a strong link between SSBs and rising childhood obesity rates worldwide (Lara-Castor et al., 2024).
• Excessive consumption of SSBs can significantly increase a child’s risk of gaining weight and developing insulin resistance, type 2 diabetes, and cardiovascular issues (Calcaterra et al., 2023).
• Liquid calories from SSBs do not provide the same feelings of fullness as solid foods can, and consuming them could lead to higher calorie intake. In addition, the sweet taste of SSBs activates reward pathways in the brain, and this could contribute to overconsumption (Costa et al., 2022).
• SSBs disrupt hunger-regulating hormones like insulin and can increase the risk of developing metabolic issues (Costa et al., 2022).

How Parents Can Make a Difference

• Make Water the Default Choice- Ensure water is easily accessible at home, and encourage your child to refill their water bottle throughout the day.
• Flavor Water Naturally- Add slices of lemon, cucumber, or berries to water to make it more appealing.
• Reduce Sugar Gradually- Gradually reduce the number of SSBs your child consumes until healthier choices become more natural and routine.
• Set Boundaries for SSBs- Reserve SSBs for special occasions or specific times, such as birthdays or family celebrations. This may help reinforce that these beverages are occasional treats rather than everyday drinks.
• Be a Role Model- Make choosing water a family effort. This team-oriented approach can help reinforce positive habits.
• Involve Your Child in Healthy Choices- Let your child pick out their favorite water bottle or choose which fruits to add to their water. Providing them with opportunities to be involved can make the process enjoyable and empower them to make healthy decisions.
• Educate- Talk to your child about why drinking water is good for them and how sugary drinks can impact their health.
• Reinforce Positive Behavior- Recognize and praise your child when they make healthy drink choices. Acknowledging these efforts may help motivate children to continue making healthier decisions.

Changing your child’s diet may be challenging at first. However, the long-term benefits can be worth the effort. Reducing or replacing SSBs can help you protect your child from potential health issues, and you may even see financial savings over time. These small steps can lead to big improvements in your child’s well-being and your family’s overall health and budget.

You can find additional resources and support that can help you build healthier habits for children and families at the 5210 Helping Families Lead Healthier Lives website (https://5210.psu.edu/).

In 1992, the World Federation for Mental Health established the first World Mental Health Day, which continues today and is held annually on October 10th (WMHD, 2024). On this day, various organizations, governments, and individuals work together to increase awareness of the mental health challenges people around the globe face each day and to create a platform for advocacy and education. Today, the Clearinghouse for Military Family Readiness at Penn State joins the World Federation for Mental Health to recognize the importance of normalizing discussions around mental health challenges, reducing stigma around mental health disorders, and providing resources and support to individuals in need.

Mental Health

One’s mental health can affect how they think, feel, and act and can influence their emotional, psychological, and social well-being (Clearinghouse for Military Family Readiness at Penn State, 2021). Often, one’s mental health defines how they cope with everyday stressors and achievements, how they deal with ups and downs in relationships, and how they make decisions (Clearinghouse for Military Family Readiness at Penn State, 2021).

Parents and Mental Health

As a parent, you need to understand what your child’s mental health needs might be and be able to recognize when your child may need outside support (Clearinghouse for Military Family Readiness at Penn State, 2021). In addition, you should be aware of and recognize your own mental health needs. Parenting can come with positive experiences like joy, love, and human connection, but it can also come with significant challenges and can create stress across the different life stages of your children (Office of the U.S. Surgeon General, 2024). Taking care of yourself may feel unnecessary or not worthy of prioritization; however, when you take care of yourself and learn how to cope with everyday stressors, you set yourself up to better help those around you.

Remember, prioritizing your health and well-being by eating healthy meals, engaging in physical activity, identifying ways to find and achieve your calm, leveraging your circle of support, and establishing a positive work-home-life balance are important elements to integrate into your life. By taking care of yourself, you will be better able to meet your own needs and help your child when they are in need. Further, when parents model healthy and effective strategies that help them regulate their own emotions, their children benefit from seeing their parents cope with difficult situations and can learn ways to help themselves manage and regulate their own emotions (Clearinghouse for Military Family Readiness at Penn State, 2022b).

Children and Mental Health

Having and exhibiting good mental health is an important component for parents as they help and support their child as they grow into a healthy adult. Children with good mental health are better able to have and maintain positive interactions with family members and friends, work towards and achieve educational milestones, and find ways to participate in their local community (Clearinghouse for Military Family Readiness at Penn State, 2021).

Experiencing poor mental health can be the result of different factors that may include biological components, such as genetic issues or brain chemistry; life experiences, such as past trauma or abuse; or a family history of mental health challenges (Clearinghouse for Military Family Readiness at Penn State, 2021). In addition, there are certain situations and instances that may increase a child’s risk for these concerns, such as family stress, chronic illness, grief and loss caused by death, or physical/sexual/emotional abuse (Youth.gov, n.d.a).

Parents and caregivers can help their children feel happy and positive about themselves by showing their children love and affection, spending time with their children, encouraging their children to talk about their feelings, and being interested in what’s happening in their children’s lives (Clearinghouse for Military Family Readiness at Penn State, 2021). Physical health is also an important component to maintaining good mental health. Just like you, as a parent, need to take care of yourself, you can help your child maintain healthy habits in their lifestyle, like being physically active, eating nutritious foods, and getting enough sleep (Clearinghouse for Military Family Readiness at Penn State, 2021).

Watch for Warning Signs

Mental health challenges can come with warning signs. Be sure to watch for any early warning signs that could indicate your child may be struggling with mental health challenges. Warning signs may include the following (Chung, 2024; Clearinghouse for Military Family Readiness at Penn State, 2021, 2022a, 2022b; Youth.gov, n.d.b):

• Eating or sleeping too much or too little
• Having problems concentrating
• Struggling in school, or showing a dramatic drop in grades
• Feeling afraid of or wanting to avoid school
• Pulling away or withdrawing from people and usual activities they used to enjoy
• Having low or no energy
• Feeling numb or like nothing matters
• Having unexplained aches and pains, or complaining of physically not feeling well over a long period of time
• Excessively dieting or exercising, or having a fear of weight gain
• Engaging in self-harm behaviors (such as cutting or burning their skin)
• Engaging in risky or destructive behavior, alone or with friends
• Having periods of highly elevated energy and activity, and requiring much less sleep than usual
• Feeling helpless or hopeless
• Using alcohol or drugs
• Sexually acting out
• Participating in illegal activities
• Running away
• Feeling unusually confused, forgetful, on edge, angry, upset, worried, or scared
• Yelling or fighting with family and friends, or wanting to spend much more time alone
• Experiencing mood swings
• Feeling anxious, or having persistent thoughts and memories they can’t get out of their head
• Making inappropriate comments like “nobody would care if I was gone “or “I don’t deserve to live”
• Hearing voices, or believing things that are not true
• Thinking of harming themself, others, or the environment
• Having suicidal thoughts

Engaging in regular physical activity is important for the health and well-being of children and aids in their cognitive and social-emotional development (Committee on Physical Activity and Physical Education in the School Environment et al., 2013). Encouraging children to be active at an early age can help them establish and build a foundation that could promote health and fitness throughout their lives.

Incorporating physical activity into everyday moments is one way to support movement and activity. For example, dancing to favorite songs, building and moving through obstacle courses, riding bikes, skipping, or going for walks to the park give children opportunities to move throughout the day. In addition, with your child, identify your child’s interests when it comes to being active, and have them try new and different activities. This exploration can be a fun learning process, especially while your child is young.

As your child ages and enters the school-age years, you may notice them gravitating towards certain activities or showing an interest in an activity or a sport. Your child’s personality traits, genetics, and athletic ability can influence their attitudes toward specific sports or activities, and your child will likely fall into one of the following fitness personalities (Nemours Kids Health, 2022):

• The athlete: This type of child has identified a specific sport or activity that they enjoy, and they may show exceptional ability and choose to compete in this sport at a high level, such as participating on a travel team or high school team.
• The casual athlete: This type of child is interested in being active, but they may not be an outstanding player and could become discouraged in a competitive environment.
• The nonathlete: This type of child may not be interested in engaging in physical activity, or they may lack athletic ability, and a parent may need to encourage them to stay active.

Parents shape their child’s experiences and participation in sports from childhood through adolescence (Hardwood and Knight, 2015). Determining where your child’s fitness personality aligns regarding individual or group sports and/or activities could help you find the right activities for your child and ensure they get a suitable amount of physical activity (Nemours Kids Health, 2022). While there are some children who may want to excel in a sport, there are others who are happy with casual participation (Nemours Kids Health, 2022).

As a parent, talk with your child to learn about their interests and goals regarding participating in sports or physical activities. Understanding your child’s desires and perspectives can help you align your expectations to your child’s goals. For example, as a child you may have participated in baseball competitively and dream of your child doing this too. However, you may learn that your child doesn’t really like team sports or only wants to be a casual or social player. Furthermore, your child’s fitness personality for one sport or activity, or all sports or activities, may change and evolve over time.

In addition, consider incorporating physical activity into your family’s everyday routines. To accomplish this, you could take an evening bike ride or walk, turn on music and dance while you set or clear the table, or play active games after dinner like musical chairs or hide-and-seek. Being active as a family can help model positive behaviors, show children the importance of being active, and make physical activity a normal part of life.

In our fast-paced world, families often juggle schedules that are filled with completing schoolwork, participating in extracurricular activities, and managing screen time. While these activities can be beneficial for children to participate in, taking part in them may leave little time for children to engage in free play which is unstructured, child-led moments that can foster healthy development. When a child engages in free play, they can nurture their creativity, social skills, emotional resilience, and cognitive growth—all of which are key to a child’s overall well-being (Ginsburg et al., 2007). As parents, recognizing the importance of free play and incorporating it into your family’s daily life can have lasting benefits for your child’s growth and happiness.

Why Free Play Matters

Free play offers children the opportunity to explore their world independently. It may enable them to do the following:

• Develop critical skills like decision-making, conflict resolution, and self-advocacy (Ginsburg et al., 2007).
• Build self-regulation, which is linked to long-term academic and emotional success (Colliver et al., 2022).
• Foster independence and creativity through natural exploration and problem-solving (Ginsburg et al., 2007).

Examples of Play Supporting Development

Unstructured play can support various areas of a child’s growth, including the following:

• Cognitive Growth: When children pretend to be others, such as a shopkeeper, they can develop cognitive skills. For example, counting items in a store, playing with pretend money, or creating signs for their store can help a child build early math, writing, problem-solving, and language skills (Hirsh-Pasek et al., 2008). Furthermore, when they engage in conversations with “customers,” they can enhance their vocabulary and communication skills. Even deciding what to sell or how to price items can encourage critical thinking and decision-making (Hirsh-Pasek et al., 2008).
• Social and Emotional Growth: Make-believe scenarios like caring for a sick doll, building a house for a stuffed animal, or helping a toy “solve” a problem can teach empathy, compassion, and social bonding. Through role-playing, children can learn to understand others’ perspectives and practice cooperation. Play also may help children process emotions, especially anxiety or trauma, by enabling them to act out and explore difficult feelings in a safe environment (Mader, 2022; Ginsburg et al., 2007).
• Executive Function Skills: Games like “Simon Says” can help build attention, impulse control, and memory for children, and these are key skills that can be used for academic success (Zosh et al., 2022). Similarly, playing “Red Light, Green Light” or “Freeze Dance” can give children opportunities to practice self-regulation and quick thinking. Even building block activities can introduce math concepts and help foster problem-solving and organizational skills when an adult guides the play (Zosh et al., 2022).

The Role of Parents in Encouraging Free Play

Parents can create an environment that nurtures free play by intentionally providing opportunities that stimulate their child’s creativity and independence. Here are some practical ways to support free play:

• Offer simple materials: Provide items like blocks, costumes, art supplies, or outdoor toys to spark imaginative play and creativity (Ginsburg et al., 2007). Even everyday household items, like cardboard boxes, plastic containers, or paper towel rolls, can be used in endless adventures.
• Set aside time: Dedicate at least 30 minutes a day for unstructured play. This time can offer children a chance to take the lead, make decisions, and develop problem-solving skills through self-directed activities (Colliver et al., 2022).
• Limit screen time: While screens can offer educational content, too much screen time can crowd out active, hands-on play opportunities. Setting clear boundaries for screen time use can give children more opportunities to engage in imaginative and physical activities (Mader, 2022).
• Encourage outdoor play: Whenever possible, provide opportunities for outdoor exploration. Nature can be a powerful setting to inspire free play and offer various possibilities for creativity and physical activity (Ginsburg et al., 2007).

Free play is more than a way for kids to have fun—it could be an essential building block to their development. When you create opportunities for unstructured play, you can help your child grow emotionally, socially, and cognitively.

Social media can enhance connections and impact relationships and experiences for the individuals who use it. Though many age groups use social media, the Pew Research Center (2024) has found that nearly 9 in 10 teens used at least one form of social media. It was also found that around 60% of teens this age use Snapchat and 59% used Instagram (Pew Research Center, 2023). With these statistics showing frequent usage, parents and caregivers may want to talk with their teens regarding their teens usage and help them learn how to navigate social media in a way that sets them up for success.

Set them up for Success

As a parent, you may be knowledgeable about how your child is using social media, and you may be having open conversations with them about appropriate behaviors regarding social media use. If not, consider engaging in a conversation that could begin by discussing with you child who they are connecting with on their social media platforms—likely their friends and peers. From there, talk with your teen about how they can speak to others with kindness and respect. You may want to ensure your teen understands that those they are communicating with are real people even though they may be physically far away. Remind your teen that they should treat others on social media as they would treat someone in person and as they would like to be treated. Furthermore, be sure your teen realizes that social media works through the use of algorithms, and users are shown, or purposefully connected to, content that correlates with words they use, whom they interact with, and content they engage with.

Connect With Friends

Your teen may be eager to add all of their peers on their social media platforms. However, not all of their peers may be their friends. Talk with your child and discuss who their friends are and what kinds of behaviors they value in their friendships, like respect and honesty. Try using questions like those below to talk about which peers they should add on their social media.
– Whom do you consider a friend?
– What types of activities do they like?
– What common interests do you have?
– Are there behaviors or activities they participate in that you don’t agree with?
– Do you think the type of social media activity they have is positive?
– Are they going to be a positive aspect to your social media presence?

Remind your teen to ask their friends if they are allowed to be added to specific social media platforms before sending invites.

Speak With Kindness

Whether we are talking with others face-to-face or on social media, what we say to people matters. Children may need reminders to speak to others online, or via social media, in a friendly and kind manner just as they would in an in-person situation. Try talking through questions, like the ones outlined below, to help your child consider suitable language as they comment on others’ posts, updates, or shares. You may wish to remind your child that their comments could be seen by many other people and these “others” may not be people they know.
– Would you say this to someone in person?
– Would you want others to see that you have said this?
– How do you think others may feel once they see you have made this statement?
– Would you want something like this said to you?

Children need to understand that when they comment or share an opinion or statement online, those words can be (and are) seen by others whom they may or may not know and who are physically close or distant from them. Though perhaps difficult for teens to comprehend, the comments and statements they make, whether positive or negative, can never be truly retracted or deleted; thus, implications and consequences may never go away. Talk to your teen about practicing empathy and the repercussions of having everyone see what they are saying.

Like What You Like

Social media is designed to show you information and suggestions that you will like and enjoy. By following, sharing, and commenting on social media accounts that are based around your interests, you are gaining access to specific platforms that will adjust and show you more content that is similar. The more you interact with specific content, the more like material you will see.

Talk with your teen and discuss their interests. Perhaps, bring up the influential people within those interests, such as athletes, artists, and influencers. Discuss how those people present themselves and use that information to show your teen the positive and negative perceptions these individuals display. Discuss how your teen views certain actions and determine how your teen may be perceived by others depending on their comments, actions, and reactions. Take the next step and ask your teen if they are pleased with what that perception may be. Try using the following questions to see if the influential people you discussed act in a way that aligns with your and your teen’s views:
– What are they known for?
– How do they treat and talk about others?
– What causes do they advocate for?
– How do people generally view this person?
– Is this person someone whom you and your teen think others should look up to? Why or why not?

These questions can help your teen think about and decide what type of content they want to place on their social media platforms. What values do they want to present? What image do they want to exhibit?

In our digital world, what we say and the actions we take on social media can have implications and consequences (positive and negative) that may follow us for much longer than it takes for us to type out a response or click share. By talking with your teen about their social media presence and what or how they post information, you are helping them learn to effectively use the digital landscape that will likely be part of their entire life.